Life as I see it

I saw this from reddit and its about why pork is allowed to be eaten by christians. Somebody asked about a tl;dr version of the bible. Here’s how it goes:

germainium [-]

Can you tl;dr the entire bible for me now? kthanxbai

poopooonyou [-]

The bible according to /b/

Old Testament; God creates the universe and he sees it’s serious buisness, but then Satan pretends to be a snake and trolls Eve, telling her “Apple of GTFO” (cuz she was already showing tits), She chooses the former and then she and her f*ck buddy Adam get banned from Eden for being trollbait. Then alot of serious incest occurs and we get the human race (which explains alot, really)

Then later God gets uber pissed about Pharaoh Hitler pwning the Jews, so he gives Moses some cheat codes for the universe. Moses stages a mass slave runaway and opens up the sea so the Jews can run through, closing it from behind him and killing the ancient Nazis. God lol’d.

Some other less important stuff happens, mostly composed of a bunch of idiots writing emo poetry about God for him to fap to.

New Testament; God finds Mary sleeping and just sticks the tip in and drops his load. Nine months later, Jesus is born, for his 13th birthday, God gave Jesus moar cheat codes than he gave Moses, plus the rcon password for life.

Later, Jesus became a hard core ska punk and trolled the old school Jews hard. They got super pissed and permabanned him with a cross and some nine inch nails. They forgot he had God mode turned on though, so he waited three days and hit vid_restart on the rcon panel, came back into life’s server, and laughed at the Jews.

After that 3 more guys tell the same story, then this fag Paul wrote an assload of crap about sex being evil and a bunch of other crap that Jesus never said.

THE END.

Jigsus [-]

Old testament tldr: Eye for an eye dawg.

New testament tldr: Be good to each other… and stop the eye poking you’re all going blind!

kybernetikos [-]

Actually Jesus did this (in those days, ‘The Law and the Prophets’ was a way of saying ‘The Bible’) :

Hearing that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, the Pharisees got together. One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Yay, I hope I did not offend anyone. No this is not to blaspheme the name of God but just a jib to elicit some laughs.

This had my blood boiling.

What this? If N<=100, what is the number of strings not greater than N in length that will entirely match (case-sensitive) the following regular expression: (ph){1,5}i+l+abs*

Now that my friend is the first question when you are asking for a funding from philabs. What is philabs?

Here's what they say about themselves.

PhiLabs is an idea incubator that provides capital to smart people with new ideas. Where capital is lacking, PhiLabs seeks to reward people who have great and innovative ideas by ensuring that enough capital is available to really develop the idea into a reality and a feasible business.

We at PhiLabs are looking forward in creating new and exciting companies by combining young aspiring entrepreneurs’ ideas, tech skills and business experience into a self sustaining business. In addition to our funding and facilities, we add value by sharing our experience in building and operating companies both offline and online. We provide a conducive environment for both learning and growth for any young entrepreneur.

Nice and dandy right?

Then that question is the first to be filled up when applying for funding.

Here’s my comment about them, I left it at yuga’s site.

Kakainis mga masyadong mayabang.

Napapanahong kanta ni gloc9.

Samahan niyo akong ma lss dito.

I found this from reddit while waiting for a miracle to happen.

I’m bored up to my wits when I encountered this song.

Serious stuff going on.

There’s a storm brewing and now simmering at twitter. It all started when Angel Locsin found the website http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Filipinos to be not funny to her taste. I lol’ed.

Here are some of the tweets made by the lady:

143redangel Guys, turuan natin ng leksyon ang mga racist na ito! I am proud to be a Filipino! – http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Filipinos..
about 6 hours ago

143redangel Pakita natin na karapat dapat tayo bigyan ng respeto.. Kaya natin ito guys We may not be perfect, pero iba ang pinoy! at proud ako!:)
about 5 hours ago

143redangel Guys, may mga bagay na kailangan natin pagtuunan ng pansin..kawawa rin yung mga nagtratrabaho sa ibang bansa, pano na lang sila?
about 5 hours ago

143redangel RT @louiecat23: hi ms.angel! i wanna read it sana kaso our ISP here in Qatar is blocking the site…is there another link po ba? thanks!
about 5 hours ago

143redangel Sori di ako natawa☹ RT @Pimplepopper: dat artcle ws meant 2 b a joke.In fct,d whle ste ws dsigned 2 poke fun at everything.Dn’t worry abt it
about 5 hours ago

We all know this is a typical reaction then it got aggravated when a gay dude started tweeting this:

bendzgerona

@143redangel grabe ang boba mo pala talaga. It’s a HUMOR site! Grr. Ganda mo pa naman ala palang laman ang utak. about 2 hours ago from web

bendzgerona

@143redangel if the site only picks on Pinoys then I will feel that way but it’s a humor wiki that picks on everyone then it’s okey.

bendzgerona

@143redangel oh my god! If you are so concerned, create an account and edit the entry! This will just make you look like a total joke.

bendzgerona

@143redangel wahaha. Ay ewan ko sa ‘yo kung need mo ng PR attention I’m just telling you wag tong site na to it’s a Lampoon for chrissake!

Its quite cute. But totally inappropriate. His point is actually valid but the delivery sucks.

Then a friend of mine started white knighting for Angel Locsin

eironotics

RT @143redangel: ngayon lang ako nakarinig na HUMOR site ang porn site na nanlalait sa pinoy

eironotics

Dud @bendzgerona, stop arguing w/ @143redangel, kya mga Filipino hindi umaasenso dhil baluktot tau mg-isp Awayin mo iba, wag kapwa Filipino

eironotics

To @143redangel,@bendzgerona mapa humor-site man o hindi, hindi tama na mang lait ng iba..

Hahahahahahaha. A classic white knighting technique!

What can we learn from this? I dont know . Let’s just enjoy the internet perhaps?

I lol’ed

Hahahah I found this video cos of my cousin’s cousin posted it at facebook.

Enjoy.

Dota vs Girlfriend

I was bored then I saw this!

The cupcake must be that good!

from this site

I saw the lifehacker’s article about people claiming they can multi task. Some researchers found out that

In a test of the degree of organisation of working memory, participants were presented with a series of letters, one at a time, and told to push a button when they saw a letter that they had seen exactly three letters previously.

Again, low multitaskers were significantly better at correctly spotting the repeated letters. Not only did the high multitaskers do worse from the beginning, they got worse at it as time went on.

So basically means you are just full of crap when you say you can actually multitask.

I also found a game for multitaskers though I had 70 points before my head exploded

Play Multitask, a free online game on Kongregate.